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.::z. 8/8.

elegantly wasted.

Thursday, January 16, 2003

SIGH.
I am a B person. For the 3rd straight year.

It didnt affect me the first 2 years I got a B grading for my APA. I guess at that time I thought a 'Very Good' is good enough. But god knows that this year I've put in much more effort in my work than the last 2 years. Thats on top of the SPRC, SLO and ISO14001 shit I was arrowed to do last year. There was of course the relocation to HDB Hub which happened during Nor's 3 months maternity leave and subsequent MCs. I handled it alone, at that time there were no CPs. And for this new IFVS I spent hours in the server room setting up databases and firewalls which were supposed to be handled by the supporting units. Heck, today I spent the entire day with IBM, NC and ITS running around entertaining all of them with their questions (Them: Its your system for the past 3 years, I dont know whats going on.. ok explain to me again). Nor is handling the application portion, she stayed back with the CPs.. they were still working when I left the office at 8pm. Tomorrow NC gonna setup the routers at Tuas and I was supposed to go there to oversee but somebody has got to be at Hub too to swing over the line to the new router when its time.. and Nor said she will be busy and she might take half day anyway... so since I cant be at 2 places at the same time, Jansen and Ricky will go Tuas and I'll stay back at Hub. Dammit. Monday I wanna go to Woodlands.

So a B is a B. But its not an A. I bet all the rest got an A too. THAT guy has been getting As. Is my quality of work not good enough? I guess its very much dependant on your unit head. From the way Lily replied to my sms (I'm the kucing kurap of ISD), I dont think she got an A too. But I think VV got it. I might be wrong. I've more or less made up my mind now on what to do. So why bother? Thats it.. why give a damn. Andrew told me that earlier. (Note to self: Get CIO to write a letter of commendation before he leaves). When I apply for a new job, they're not going to look at my APA. I've already got Letters of Commendation from CEO for my ISO14001 work, from my NS CO for being Best Soldier.. going to get CIO to write me one.. that should count to something... ah forget it.

Oh! In the morning I found out I got the Bintan Bungalow Resort thing for 27-31 Jan. Got all excited and emailed the gang and everybody was making plans and all that. Its a 3 bedroom huge villa with a private pool and a "unique sunken bath" right in front of the master bedroom! And a buggy that you can drive around the entire resort! Wow! Went to tell Nor about it and she said "But the IFVS implementation is on the 26th. There is no way you can go."
I sat in front of her and said "Ok fine.. I'll go on the 28th". She said "No.. its a huge implementation! You're the big guy handling the hardware! What if there are server problems? What if the routers dont work? Even if I say can, Boon Nam wont approve. You cant go for the whole week after implementation, try to swap with somebody else"
OH MAN. THIS SUCKS BIG TIME. I wanted to tell her "So what! I'm a B person! I'm not supposed to care! You're the PL anyway" But I entertained her. I emailed 2 other guys who also got the Bintan thing but at a later date. One said she is not able to and one said he'll get back to me tomorrow. Well dammit if I cant get somebody to swap with me, I'll still go. AND THAT'S THAT. Dont say I didnt try.

Picked Merv up from his home at 830 and we had coffee and wings at Bedok Reservoir KPT. I called Poh halfway and found out he was watching Lord of the Rings with his wife cos today is her birthday. He called me back when the movie ended and talked to me from the cinema exit.. to the lift.. to the MRT station... from Tampines to Eunos, and while walking around Eunos with his wife looking for dinner. I guess that must have pissed Audrey big time cos I heard a "Who's that?" in the background and then Poh said "Zul hold on" and then in the background, shouting "Audrey!!! Where are you going??!!". HAHA. So I told him, hey you better go look for your wife now, and I hung up the phone. That guy is a goof man. Later on Merv used my hp and sms Poh "Mervin wish your wife a happy birthday". Heh. So BIG of him. It was only when I reached home that Poh replied with "Oh thanks, she had a good time tonight". Riiiiight... riiiiight.

So I am not Outstanding. Fine. I will find my place in the sun somewhere else then. I told VV earlier on, I wanna do something great. Like write the Great Singapore Novel. I need a sponsor.

- 'I pass the test,' she said. 'I will diminish, and go into the West, and remain Galadriel.'



posted by zul, 11:06 PM

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